As incredibly awesome as the concept of walking up to people's houses and having them gleefully hand you over their candy can be, the fact that you get to dress up in a costume is a mucho-bonus! It does however give you two very challenging choices to choose from. Do you:
A - Go with a store-bought costume that always looks better on the package then it is in reality.
B - Go with the tried but true homemade costume, that your mother tries valiantly to convince you is way better then those store bought ones.
The homemade ones were usually better, but there was always the possibility you would be labeled as too "poor" to afford the store-bought variety. The store bought costumes usually consisted of a "body-suit" of sorts that was supposed to mimic a superhero or television character. It was typically sold with a very cheap plastic mask that would be held to your face with what had to have been the thinest rubber band allowable by law. The combination of sweat and drool on the mask meant that by the third house, you were usually done with the mask for the night. This meant your costume just became about 50% lamer. I think my parents indulged me twice as a child with the store bought costume. I believe one year I was "Lance-a-lot Link, Secret Chimp".
It's every bit the classic I imagined it to be. The other costume I remember my parents purchasing for me was something called "The Bug-a-Loos".
I'm not sure I even remember what the "Bug-a-Loos" were, perhaps a poor man's "Banana Splits"?The greatest concern that all parents lived in fear of was the old "razor-blade in the apple" trick. It was the dread over this fiendish move that forced you to turn over all of your candy to your parents so they could inspect it like it was the Dead Sea Scrolls. I'm quite confident that when the kitty for the night was returned to me, it was typically a little light...know what I'm sayin?
When it was Halloween at college, the costumes were pretty much all homemade since all available funds went for alcohol. I do remember that many girls chose to dress as prostitutes on Halloween. I don't recall it making things any easier if you know what I mean, but nobody seemed to mind.
For those who went to SUNY Oswego, you may recall the aforementioned "Bridge Street Run". (Like Woodstock, if you remember the "Bridge Street Run", you probably didn't partake). Bridge Street was the main drag through the thriving metropolis that is Oswego, New York. It's not quite the Champs d'elysee, but what it lacks in high end shops and magnificent architecture, it makes up for with a prodigious amount of bars. a couple of dozen between East 9th street and the campus. Most looked like houses where somebody decided to hang a "Genesee" beer light in their front window, but as long as they were open, they were going to get perused by the brothers come Halloween.
Ofcourse, once you have kids, Halloween means taking them trick or treating and getting or making them a costume, and serving as "Inspector General" of the candy. As chief candy inspector, I immediately begin to eye-ball the ones that I wished to set aside for myself, the ones that are not always the most popular, sort of like "hidden treasures". Maybe a "Clark Bar" or a "Pay-Day", or best of all, the "$100,000 Dollar bar". I felt that I had earned this right, since I was usually the one who took the boys out on Halloween. My wife preferred answering the door and seeing the kiddies in their costumes. This was fine by me since it always meant trying to keep our dog from running out the front door and howling like a stooge every time the doorbell rings. My wife also proceeds to keep count of how many kids say "Thank You" after we give them candy. You would be surprised how many don't. My wife is also in charge of Pumpkin carving, and does a great job. Sometimes we leave the carved out Pumpkin around the house and develop fruit flies, which then like to perch themselves on your wine glass which is kind of gross.
One thing I never see anymore is trick or treating for "UNICEF". UNICEF is a United Nations' organization that helps with children's charity needs. Since it is run by the U.N., most of the people involved with it ride around on black helicopters, and spend most of their time preaching about the "new world order"! One year though, our school made us carry a box for pennies and we had to ring people's bell and say the phrase, "Trick or Treat for UNICEF". I don't remember how many "pennies" I collected, but I do know my father was against it. According to him, UINCEF was an anti-semitic organization. He also told me the same thing about the Red Cross, the Dallas Cowboys, the I.O.C, the entire southeastern part of the United States, the Baltic States, OPEC, and the Vienna Boys Choir. (I might be a little off on that last one?)
My favorite part of the night is when I can shut off all of the outside lights that I use to keep young "toughs" from terrorizing our home with various silly string, eggs, shaving cream and toilet paper. Then I can go to sleep, wake up the next morning, survey the damage, and wonder why for one night, it's okay in our society to act like an ass-hole?
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